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New Year’s Resolutions are Stupid

by | Dec 18, 2018

Ahhhh, new year’s eve. A night I used to spend dressing up, drinking too much and then complaining about how it never met my expectations. Then I made the resolutions: “this year I’ll… eat better, work out more, stay organized, make my bed every damn day first thing, never hit snooze, drink more water and less diet Coke, eliminate all sugar, sleep at least 8 hours a night, meditate every day, blah blah blah. Who’s with me? How many of you feel a little pitter pat of recognition inside you?

We’re old enough now to know that we won’t follow our resolutions. Making new year’s resolutions simply don’t work. In fact, the biggest changes I’ve made in my life were NEVER at the new year and were NEVER actually resolutions.

And yet…here we are, at the precipice of a new year and we all want something. We want some version of feeling better. And since we are hardwired to see the beginning of a new year as an invitation to make changes, let’s use this time to take a look inward and set some intentions, which is a much more powerful and meaningful practice than that stupid resolution setting. Read on for some ways to do just that.

Listen, we all want something more than we have. It might be a better career, more clients, to lose weight, get in shape, have a better relationship with our kids or partner, organize and freshen up our spaces, or a million other things. Even the people I know who are the most grounded and are kicking ass in their lives want more. There is nothing wrong with that, in fact, it’s healthy.

We should always be growing, evolving, and up leveling in some way. If we aren’t, then we’re static and life gets boring and dull. And if that happens, we become boring and dull. And cranky. And unsatisfied. So, let’s end 2018 (a challenging year to say the least) setting some intentions and getting ready for something awesome.

Tools and tips for intention setting for 2019:

  • Give yourself permission to want something more. It’s healthy and normal. And if you are having a hard time knowing what that something more is, or difficulty in giving yourself permission, there are some offers at the end of this post that are just for you.
  • Do something that declares you are serious. Write it down. Make a vision board. Make a Pinterest board. Tell someone else and have them hold you accountable.
  • Figure out what you do have that you are stoked about. Practicing gratitude and focusing on that good stuff can be incredibly powerful in helping you realize what needs to change…and what is actually pretty darned good.
  • Do some mindfulness checking in. When you think you might know what intention to set, check in with your body to see if it resonates. Our bodies do not lie to us.
  • And for the love of all that is good and holy, please PLEASE PUH-LEASE start with realistic, reachable goals and intentions. There is no faster way to feel shittier about your life and yourself than declaring you’re going to run a marathon in March when you haven’t run even a mile in December…or whatever your equivalent is. For instance, if your intention is to get more sleep, don’t vow to sleep 9 hours a night when your current average is 6. Start with 6 1/2…REACHABLE GOALS!

It’s not easy to change your life. Resolutions don’t work. But, setting mindful, clear, and reasonable goals and intentions do. I want to help support you. If you find it hard to get clear on what you want or how to get there, or if you feel guilty giving yourself permission to want more and go get it, I have some ways I can help.

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